Friday, January 20, 2012
People tell me to believe in family love.. tell me to love them more cause they are the only one that will be there for us when we needed them. I try very hard to believe in what others tell me, i try to feel the love that i have from this family but instead of love we exchange more ugly greeting. We dont see eye to eye.. everyone behave selfish or maybe i am the selfish one. They hold hand in hand and i am the only odd one out.. Maybe i am the problem one that i cant see the problem myself, maybe i am the one who keep pointing finger at others but not myself.
I dunno what else i can do to make this family better.. I was at her house just now, sitting at the playground alone. I was asking myself should i msg her, to ask her kept me for 1 night. Telling her that i just dont feel like going home, tell her that i just need a listening ear, i just wish that someone that i trusted the most and understand me the most r there for me when i needed someone.
I was crying.. crying so badly like a little child. I ask God for direction, i ask God what else i can do to make it better, he say to my heart.. cry out loud.. i will give u my shoulder to cry on. Sometime i dont understand why do i still pretend i am alright when i know my heart is not doing well. I wish she was there when all these happen at least i will not feel so left out.
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
2:28 AM
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