Friday, December 24, 2010
It is xmas eve, staying at hm all alone. She is spending her 1st special holiday with someone she loved, no longer with that snowman. I miss her, i miss the special holidays that we spent together!!! I visited eggcow today and i talk to eggcow abt me and her.. I miss those time that she accompany to visit eggcow, although she can see my softer side but i know i am not alone cause she is always there for me. Last 2 days we have a 'heart to heart talk' we trash things out via sms. I know she is someone we dont like to talk things out, she will to keep it within herself. Sometime she just dont know what is the right way of expressing the feeling toward someone. She told me not too be too nice to her, she dont know how to react back to me. I told here i didnt do much just to be nice to you, everything is done from the heart. She said she dont want to get used for being treated nicely by me.. I dont know is she afraid that she might get back the feeling with me again or she is afraid of wat her partner will feeling. She confronted me abt me still having feeling for her, she know i still looking for some hope within her but still.. even how much hope i hope for there will not be a chance to let this happen. Even it happen i bet it will not last long because to her this is not what she wan in her life.. she told me that she love him more than he love her. Sometime she feel hurts abt that cause she is given more than she should give, i can feel that sometime she fight so hard for it.
All these are part of life just that i am not gentleman enough to let it go.. i am not accepting the fact that she is spending her life with someone else... sharing the dreams that we used to share but not with me anymore. She thank me for shower her with love in the past but she said that is the past and it should remain there. Yes i am just like those love... still living and staying in the past. Time is up.. time will not wait for anyone.. maybe i should look forward and force myself to leave the past. I love her, really love her. I really wish that i could spend the rest of my life with her. I fight so hard for her so that she will be happy and in return all i wish was just that smile from her face will just make my day. Dee.. I love u.. this year i am spending xmas alone and with you this xmas is really cold!!! Once again.. merry xmas baby!!!
XOXO,
Sn0w_MaN
好冷
雪已经积的那么深
Merry Christmas to you
我深爱的人
好冷
整个冬天在你家门
Are you my snow man
我痴痴 痴痴的等
雪 一片一片一片一片
拼出你我的缘份
我的爱 因你而生
你的手摸出我的心疼
雪 一片一片一片一片
在天空静静缤纷
眼看春天 就要来了
而我也将 也将不再生存
好冷
雪已经积的那么深
Merry Christmas to you
我深爱的人
好冷
整个冬天在你家门
Are you my snow man
我痴痴 痴痴的等
雪 一片一片一片一片
拼出你我的缘份
我的爱 因你而生
你的手摸出我的心疼
雪 一片一片一片一片
在天空静静缤纷
眼看春天 就要来了
而我也将 也将不再生存
雪 一片一片一片一片
拼出你我的缘份
我的爱 因你而生
你的手摸出我的心疼
雪 一片一片一片一片
在天空静静缤纷
眼看春天 就要来了
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
6:48 PM
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