Saturday, September 18, 2010
5days have past we have not contacted each other, i thought i can forget about her but i was wrong. This 5 days seem to be so long, even there are frens around me but i just feel different. I was super emo yesterday, maybe due to work that why i behave this way. I was invited to 1 of the bar soft launch on wed.. a place that i was looking forward to go. I didnt really know where i was going until that morning.. than i told my friend erm.. i cant make it. The main reason is not that i cant make it, it is just that i dont want to go to a place will make me unhappy. A place that i will have high possibility seeing her and i just dont want to make things ugly. Maybe because of this that why it affect my mood on thus morning.. and i am dying to let my anger and sadness out..
I was on msn with 1 of my ex F&B manager, he was asking me whether i am interested to head back to F&B industry. He told me there are alot of opening at RWS & MBS and telling me that he is planning to head to either of the hotel to work. I told him that i will consider and will get back to him regard abt this. Today i got a call from him.. he told me that he is planning to join 'Kbar' and asking me whether i am interested.. well in F&B industry we have connection and it is quite comman to join here and there. I didnt really hear the bar name so i ask him to send me email for me to find out more. I was abit sian after i read the email.. position was good and i guess the pay will be good too but due to personally reason i reject the offer. I will love to give a try as mixlogist but at this moment for personally reason i got give a miss.
I took a train back home today, i was reading through 1 of the past msg she leave for me when i was away for a trip. It just feel so love again.. but still i am cheating myself. I know she will not come back again, i also dont know why i am still holding on that msg. Me and some frens was talking about some job changing and what industry we planning to major in. I always have this thingy that i wanna to travel around the world without worries.. just pack my bag and go kind. That is the reason i choose travel industry, i did pack and go for a few times back to few years back when i was young. I love that kind of freedom feeling and unknown reason for leaving. I thought i can have this kind of life for long but i realise that i was wrong, end of the day i will still come to an ending. I have a dream to meet, a dream that i wanna to make it come true asap.. It is a big dream, a big commiment. I dont know when will this drema come true but i will try my best to fufill it.
Tml will be another day that i might be seeing her.. seriously i am not really looking forward because it will just bring back more of my emo feeling. I cant do much but to pretend she is not around, pretend that everything is fine. I wish that i can just leave this world so that i will be free from all the trouble.
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
2:24 AM
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