we talk things out last night it was not a plesent talk, alot of debate and unhappiness have bought it. Maybe too long never have heart to heart talk end of the day everything just throw out after so long. I know she is not happy abt this r/s maybe she really dont love me anymore, no more that kind of love feeling within us. Maybe is just me that being selfish in all way want the best of all things never really consider about how she feel. In the end she actually feel lock up by me, feel that i have change her. She feel that is no longer that angel anymore, she no longer that fav one among her friends. Maybe i did really change abit of her to another someone or like wat she say maybe i really dont know her well. I dun understand her and she dont understand me, that why things fall apart. To make her happy i have to let her go, release her from me so that she can get her freedom back. I also dont want thing to turn ugly & sour, this will affect both of us at work and at school so i need to make a choice. I guess slowly i have to walk out the grey area to the white zone so that we can still be friend again. I know those happy moment that we shared will always be kept in our heart, i believe these are not fairytale it is something that we truely believe before. Now got to rearrange my life again and sort things out, pack up these broken heart and put them into the box. Move back home and sleep on my bed alone again, ride alone to work and home, stay home over the weekend to spend time with shannon. Less phone call, less msg, less contact. Now I am back to starting point again, how long will i be at the starting point? I really dont know and i really dont want to know. Let my fate decide on how it should be like cause i dont really have much choice to choose.
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
7:16 PM