It have been so long since i am back here.. i guess here is a place where only 2 persons will know abt it and i used to have a all time reader who never fail to read my rubbish when she is bored.. but i guess now she dont read them anyhow. Personally if close fren ask me how am i now.. i will tell him / her that my life is shit.. i am in stuck in something shitty which i dont have a choice.. staying on is for the sake of staying on.. on 1 hand i complain abt how about i abt it.. how much i wan that person to get out of my fxxking life.. on another hand my heart worry about the person.. It is a super shitty feeling that u r stuck not here not there... nothing much i can do but just to complain and let it be what it is.. choices is choose by me, so if i decide on it i just have to accept it and not blaming anybody.. Sometime i realise that i have lost my happiness.. i have lost that smile somewhere down the road.. i dunno where i kept it or where i lose it.. Friends who know me for years even notice the changes in me and my life.. they cant help but to ask why?? what happen.. my only answer is i choose the life myself and this is what i get in the end..

i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at 1:42 AM