Monday, May 14, 2007
Someone ever wrote this to me:
Sunday, May 13, 2007
As I sit here
Idling by
Thoughs of you
Come with mind
The joyful fun
The deepest pain
The true love
Cant be refrained
What's on my mind
For you to guess
What's in my life
That's you i guess
If i could just
Walk far away
Maybe You'll want me
For good to stay
But I am bounded
By my love
And You are
All the heartaches worth
So I'll stand here
By your side
Until you love
Someday subsides
And now we'll live
As happily as ever
But never dare
Utter the word forever.
- With love, XOXO -
I was flapping through some old letters and photo than reliase that i have complate my primary school for 10yrs and only 4 primary school friends i still keep in touch with. I also was reading some of the old letters and greeting cards from my old church friends, schoolmates, goodfriends and of cause those mushy love letters from my past relationship. I am actually quite boring la keep those letters for years than after a few months or few years will digging out and read it again. As i was reading those i was laughing at myself all those silly mistake that i use to make, all those comment and encourage that i get from my friends. I felt so old when i think back about my past, and of cause i do miss those school time that i have beside those time when we have to attend classes and exam. Since i left school till now i didnt actually go back to school for visiting cause i think it's actually very silly to do so but kind of miss those teachers and school friends.
I miss those school day when you have camp fire on your 1st month of sec school, cross country day , sport day, school sport zone compatition, youth day, national day and school holidays. Those days we will gossip about others girls that we dun like, tell our best friends that i crush this guys from the next class or from the sport group of next you know will be some guys is court on you. After school some of us will go for movies, some will go shopping at nearby shopping mall and of cause those love birds will sit at the fast food resturants to talk all day long.
I guess for those who havent been keeping in touch with your old friends time to keep in touch and to recap some sweet memoies that you use to share with them.
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
7:32 PM
Hey ppls i am back from karbi haiz... tell u something the hotel really suck it's so big different from the website that i saw it's really damn sian. Haiz... reach the 1st night it was raining so heavily and by the time we check into hotel was abt 10pm liao, my mum all most lost her luggage haha... but lucky it was out on the baggage bay. My expection of the hotel was abt like singapore 4* hotel but in the end when i check it the hotel was i feel like i was living in the rain forest for the next 4 days. Every where in the hotel was full of spider web, lizards. and others tiny little friends and i seriously didnt slept well for 4nights, the hotel does not have 24hrs room service, hotel breakfast is only 3kinds everyday 1st ABF,2nd CBF,3rd Asian Breakfast. I eat the same breakfast everyday i wake up and i really dun look forward to it every morning, as i feed my stomach with food i also feeding the wen zi with my fresh type A+ blood. After breakfast was looking forward for a good tan in the hotel but... the hotel pool seen like it have been clean since they open 6mths ago, this is the worse hotel that i ever been in my life it's ever worse then my bali trip. It's just like a budget hotel to me and i am paying $140 per room per night and i am getting a $70bucks quility, the only thing i am happy with the hotel was the staff cause the are friendly enough and they able to meet my request but they dun really understand english so got a hard time to talk to them. I was stuck in the hotel for the 2nd day it was tunder storming and my room balcony was fill up with rain water, i only manage to get out of the hotel at 7pm by than all my mood was gone. I slept through the whole afternoon then after that watch star movie and espn haiz, it's so 'fun' for me man and because if the rain i have to eat cup noodle for lunch cause i cant go out to buy food. I went for island trip to phi phi island the next day i woke up at 7.30am in the morning it's the only time i woke up so early cause my mum is so look forward but was i was having breakfast it start to pour again haiz... fuck up. We were luck enough that the rain stop before we left for the tour, i took speed boat and when i was out at the sea it was high tight and the ride was so choppy and the tour guide still tell was that we were travelling at 180km/hr on that speedboat haiz... fuck man. I went to dive and hehe... i saw nemo it's so tiny and cute but not much of those manly are big fish, so again it start to rain when i am back for the trip. I also went to raliey beach and finally i have a great golden tan hehe... and of cause i am back home and i am so fucking tired for the trip. I swear i will never book buri tara hotel again it really suck not worth the $$ that i pay, but i will be back for karbi during their sunny session again.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
12:38 AM
how many of us actually treasure your partner when you are in a realtionship? I wonder if you are so nice to your partner during the realtionship are you real and true to her? When the time that you cheat on her or lie on her did you actually feel guilty or sad when your partner realise that you can be so angel to her something but when you turn into a monster you are really a monster. I was asking this qus to myself how much or how deep i actually love xueren last time, if i really love xueren that much i wouldnt have do thing to hurt xueren. I couldnt give myself an answer it's something i cant explain, i know i am a really *ssh*le which i guess everyone know but it's something which i did it to xueren cruelly. Some people might think it a;ready 2yrs since the break up why do you still hungover this incident, it's you who is at fault no one to blame so you cant keep holding on to it and doesnt move on. Xueren have already move on with it's own life and so do you why do you keep thinking abt it. I really xueren blog recently i still rememeber last time it will always start by Wayne & I..... but now is Karyn and I..... haha.... It's going to be their 1 yr if i am not wrong haha... 1yr for that xueren & karyn and 3yr for xueren & wayne. I know xueren love her alot alot cause at the most down point karyn become her angel and i guess i have never been so nice to her when i was with xueren, I read about some past thing that xueren use to blog and cetain thing i actually didnt know until i read about it. Image a blog which i didnt know until 2yrs later, that xueren also didnt tell me that as well it's so happen i was at that website and i realise it. I guess it's too late for me to realise also la haha... it doesnt make a different also la, it will just make thing worse if i still hanging over this. I guess too much thing for me to talk about i guess i am getting old haha... old something that i shouldnt mantion over here cause alot of my frens is ever older. I know xueren is doing fine now,haiz.. always busy with work dun ever have time for lunch & dinner. I am really worry abt it man haiz... hope that no sickness will come and look for xueren.
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Maybe i didn't treat you quite as good as i should
Maybe i didn't love you quite as often as i could
Little things i should've said and done, i never took the time
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
Maybe i didn't hold you all those lonely, lonely times
And i guess i never told you, i'm so happy that you're mine
If i made you feel second best, i'm so sorry, i was blind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
Tell me, tell me that your sweet love hasn't died
Give me one more chance to keep you satisfied
Satisfied
Little things i should've said and done, i never took the time
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
Tell me, tell me that your sweet love hasn't died
Give me one more chance to keep you satisfied
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
You were always in my house
(you were always)(always)
(you were always)(always)
(you were always)
"you were always on my mind, it's trueI never thought of anyone else but you
You were on my mind and in my dreams
I should have stopped to make you seeYou were always..."
(you were always)
"i worked so hard, i thought you knew,My love, i did it all for youI never really had the time
I guess you couldn't read my mindYou were always..."
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
6:27 PM
Freedom, it something in life we can lack of I still remember when we were young our parents always control our freedom> they always must know where we are, who we go out with, what are we doing and the most important is wat time are we coming back home. I still remember during secondary singtel & motorola come out with the 1st pager service and my mum actually bought it and use it to trace me. Whenever i go out she will pg me all day long and if i dun reply the next day i cant use my pg or my voicemail box will be fill up with my mum's voice. As we grow up our parents being to let go our freedom slowly bit by bit and soon we got into relationship we meet our bf/gf and begin our new love life with them. We share everything we use to share with our parent with them, we tell them alot of our personal thing and anything under the sun we can talk abt. We tag alot when they are meet their frens or family members, we cry when something bad happen to them and we share the joy with them. We being to go 1 step further we start to ask about where they go and make sure they report to us, what time they wan to come home and will they be meet you tonight. All this qus is just back to square when you were parent also control you in this way and i bet all of us dun like this and why are we doing all this to our loves ones. Are you scared that maybe you give too much of the freedom and they will take advantage on you? or are you scared that if you let them go out to have fun they will turn back to their wild life? I dunno what is the main reason perhaps it's just human nature to behave like this or maybe it's just that girl or that guy who wan to behave this way. How much to let go or how much to trust is to show you much you actually love that person.
i skated in the lonely world ...quiet and undisturbed at
6:09 PM
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